Guess Kim's Age

When it comes to height, not everyone in this world is evenly blessed. The rest of my family falls into the 5'5"-5'10" range of average or tall. Not me. I'm the Wilson anomoly.
Measuring in at barely 5'0 (5' 1/8" on a good day), I have a disturbing ability to fit into clothing from the "Misses" section at the department stores. I can remember growing up how much I hated our regular height-measuring sessions. Dad used to get out a level (we have to be absolutely precise on such important measurements!) and measure to see how tall we were growing. Then, he would mark a line on the wall, indicating our height. The first few times I dashed over with my siblings, excitedly demanding that Dad check my height too. It didn't take long for me to lose my enthusiasm for this ritual. You can only measure so many times how much you haven't grown before it gets really monotonous.
Not only am I short, but I have the baby face to fit my height. When I was a kid, one of my favorite games to play with visitors was "Guess Kim's Age." Suffice it to say, we had a lot of very embarrased guests by the end of that game. In my defense, I had to do something to ease the annoyance of being constantly mistaken for Becca's younger sister.
Well, eventually I grew up, but I didn't grow taller. The funny thing about getting older is that I find myself initiating the "Guess Kim's Age" game less and less. I don't have too. People everywhere take the initiative to bumble my age without my having to worry about encouraging it on. I've had a few good laughs over some of my favorite responses to "Guess Kim's Age." Here are just some of the memorable age guesses I have received over the years:

1. At Excalibur, the hotel we stayed at in Las Vegas over Thanksgiving break, we decided to check out the weight room one morning. My dad, my fifteen-year-old sister, Heather, and I headed down to see what they had. At the front desk, we asked about the weight room. The lady at the desk began rattling off "The weight room costs $20, and you have to be at least eighteen years-old, so these two couldn't go."

2. At the beginning of November I went to the polls to vote in our local election. When I stepped up to the booth and told them my name, the lady at the desk said. "You don't look old enough to vote!"

3. On my mission, in one of my areas my companion and I went to the hospital to ask about volunteering as clergy there. The lady at the desk peered down her nose at us and then said "Now, you understand there is an age requirement for this." A little surprised I answered "No, I didn't realize that." She looked back at me. "How old are you?" she inquired. "I'm twenty-one," I replied. Suddenly she looked very uncomfortable. "Really?" she asked, confused. "I thought you were thirteen."

4. Also on the mission one time I slipped out the driver's side of our car, only to have an old man ask me "Can you even see to drive that car?" After I assured him that I could, he muttered "I swear they get younger all the time!"

5. Yet another time on the mission, my companion and I got invited in to talk to a house full of creepy older men. We were attempting to testify to them when one of them interrupted (much to my companion's chagrin) "Are you a mother-daughter combination?" Later on, they asked if I was thirteen.

6. (This one isn't a mistake about my age, but it's such a funny illustration of my youthful looks that I'm including it anyway.) During the summer my ward had a video scavenger hunt. One of the things we were supposed to video-tape was a cross-dresser. Somehow I got elected to perform for this one, but my group decided it wasn't good enough to have me dress up like a man. Because of my height and looks, they insisted I dress as a little boy. The most tragic part is that I actually fit the clothes from the little boy's section. Complete with wrestling T-shirt, cargo shorts, and Spiderman backpack, I fit the part. Too bad I forgot to bring my still camera.

7. When I finished my mission, Mom and Janel were gracious enough to come pick me up at the mission home. Later Janel confided to me that she hadn't recognized me when she first opened the door. "You look older now," she told me. "You actually look like you're seventeen now instead of thirteen!"

Random Lists

4 Jobs I've Had
1. Religion/Family History Reference Assistant, Harold B. Lee Library
2. Server at the MTC Cafeteria\
3. Telesurveying (may I die before I do this again-- 3 weeks was 3 weeks too long!)
4. Secretary, bills manager, lawn mower, orchard pruner/waterer/picker/canner, gardener, helper with everything else Dad wanted to do (including painting, calking, sheetrocking, mudding, putting in pipes, putting in electric lines, pulling up carpet and any other remodeling work). Pretty much I was free manual labor (okay, maybe not free as in cost, but free as in way too readily available. No wonder I started looking around for other options!)

4 Things I Do Instead of Going to Bed
1. Email/Facebook/Play around on the computer
2. Look at family members' blogs or update this blog
3. Listen to my roomates' never-ending dating traumas or share my own dating traumas (in an apartment of 4 girls, there just never seems to be enough of this. Someone always has a creepy guy interested in them, or wants to get back with their ex-boyfriend or can't decide which guy to date, etc. etc. etc. It's enough to stay up every night and expound upon.)
4. Read cheesy but captivating books like Twilight and the newest Harry Potter.

4 Most Common Cravings for this Week
1. CHOCOLATE. (I'm not even sure if this can accurately be counted as a craving any more. It's more like a fact of life. I'm awake, I want chocolate.)
2. Boo berries (I'll be honest-- after Danielle's blog post I had them on the brain. Luckily, since it was actually Halloween they were on sale for only $1.50, which relieved most of my guilt over giving in to such frivilous urges.)
3. Anything with cheese in it, but especially a ham and cheese sandwich (sadly my ham seems to have disappeared into that black hole in the back of the fridge that always manages to swallow up the food you know you had a day ago).
4. Fresh fruit. Obviously I need to go grocery shopping some time soon . . .

4 Special Features of My Apartment
1. My bedroom window, with no screen on it. I discovered this within a couple of days of moving in, when the flies started mysteriously appearing in the apartment. One side of the window is covered with a screen, but for some reason the other side isn't. At least it makes a perfect location for launching water ballons or other treats at unsuspecting victims below!
2. The half-performing microwave. Every time I warm a plate of food up, I pull it out to find half the plate still ice-cold and half the plate near boiling. Doesn't that go against some law of physics somewhere? Light and dark can't be in the same place in the same time. I didn't think heat and cold could be either.
3. The Fishbowl. Monticello is unique in that it has 2 apartment complexes that face each other, with a gap somewhere between 15 and 20 feet apart. The common area between is appropriately called the fishbowl because at such a short distance, everyone can hear and see everything that goes on in all the other apartments. Example: The other night a girl from the ward came over to share her latest dating trauma with our apartment. As we were all listening and discussing it, one of my roomates got a text message from a guy that lives in the complex directly across from us, in the basement (we're on the 3rd floor). The text said "We can hear you from here!" Yikes.
4. A peculiarly high engagement rate. Girls that live here seem to catch marriage like the plague. The girl that lived in this apartment before me just got engaged a couple of weeks ago. The apartment next door, where I used to live, had at least 2 people get engaged there in the last year. We'll have to start taking bets on who's next.

4 Books I've Read over 15 Times
1. Beauty (by Robin McKinley)
2. A Little Princess ( I used to pretend that Mom was mean Miss Minchin when she would make me do my chores and I was Sara, the heroine, who never retaliates, but meekly obeys and makes everything better by imagining that she was a princess.)
3. The entire Work and the Glory series. I'm not sure exactly when Janel got me hooked on them, but I found an entry in my journal, dated 3-12-95 that noted that I was reading the Work and The Glory volume 4. After that I re-read them regularly, especially around Christmas when I knew we'd get the latest volume.
4. Pride and Prejudice

4 Projects I can't Seem to Finish
1. Writing my life history. Oh wait, I haven't even started that one. Dang.
2. Organizing my room. Every time I swear to, another pile of stuff appears. Maybe fore my new year's resolution . . .
3. Scanning the family photos for Mom
4. Memorizing The Ride of Paul Revere by Washington Irving. I've started it half-a-dozen times and every time I get stuck after the first page.

4 Silly Things I did in 4th Grade
1. Read every baby-sitter's club, Sweet Valley Twins, boxcar kids, and Nancy Drew book ever published multiple times over. Did I really not have anything better to do with my time?
2. Convinced myself that half of the boys in my class secretly had crushes on me and confided my hunch to my best friend, Megan.
3. Felt bitterly disappointed when my pumpkin/easter mobile/anything else we made in class never won any of Mrs. Heilesons' regular art contests. I guess art just isn't one of my talents.
4. Got scared to death after watching the movie The House With a Clock In Its Walls in library time and refused for years afterward to even look at a John Bellair book or have a ticking clock anywhere in my bedroom. (The plot involved an evil sorcerer who left a clock inside a house that was really a bomb that could go off at any time.)

4 Goals I Have Made Every Time I Have Made Goals
1. Get to bed early (obviously the time this list was posted answers any questions about how well I have succeeded at this goal)
2. Practice the piano more.
3. Organize my time (and not wait to do homework until 2 hours before it's due)
4. Be more outgoing-- talk to people instead of waiting for them to talk to me.

Monkey Business

Why are practical jokes so much fun? I never can seem to get tired of them (as long as they're not the really mean kind). Case in point:

Today at work I was at the desk when I noticed that one of my co-workers had left his facebook account up at the desk. First of all, he wasn't supposed to be using facebook at work. Secondly, that's pretty risky leaving your account open where anyone can get into it . . .

I think you can guess what happened next.

Suffice it to say that the next time my co-worker opened his account, he was more than a little surprised to see that he had a new profile picture. Instead of the usual self-portrait, someone had posted a picture of a monkey.

Luckily I didn't get in trouble for changing the picture. My boss even agreed that it was a better picture than the one my co-worker had chosen for himself, and suggested that next time I find facebook open at work, I should change his password as well.

What better way to end the week than a little monkey business?

The Top 10 Things I Refuse To Do

1. Watch The Office. Just because everyone else is doing it. I refuse to blend in with the crowd.

2. Go to a football game. Why would I want to sit for 4 hours and freeze to death watching a bunch of people jump on top of each other when I could be home cuddled up in a blanket, reading Pride and Prejudice for the 100th time? Okay, maybe if a really cute boy asked me to go with him . . .

3. Eat brats. Barf. Same goes for sauerkrat. Who in their right mind would want to eat bloated, greasy sausages and pickled cabbage?

4. Go bulimic. Read Suzy's blog for details.

5. Go on a roller coaster. I can just get the stomach flu again for a much cheaper price.

6. Talk to Confederate Man again at work. For those who haven't heard this delightful story, he's a patron who comes in, wearing a confederate hat (to make a statment, I think), and proceeds to talk with anyone who will listen for at least 1/2 an hour straight. His questions range everywhere from "Where did Spencer W. Kimball say that the Adam-God theory was false?" to "Have you heard about how the Sword of Laban is supposed to remain unsheathed until the Second Coming?" Talk about weird. It's somewhat reminiscent of my days on the mission. Fortunately I learned a good trick back then: "Ignoring is bliss!" I think he's finally starting to get the hint. Either that or he's just too absorbed in researching whether or not Adam had a bellybutton.

7. Give up on reading the Old Testament. I may have started it over 2 years ago, but I'm not giving up now. I finally made it to Nahum and I'm determined to hold out until the end. Only 27 pages to go!

8. Go tanning. With my fair skin, I don't think skin cancer will need any extra help.

9. Let Becca leave any more moldy bread on my car. Pranksters, beware! I'll be plotting a comeback for any knaves foolhardy enough to try.

10. Go without dark chocolate for longer than 24 hours. I think I might start experiencing withdrawal symptoms if I did. Or at very least, I'd be perilously in danger of losing my membership in the Wilson chocoholics club, and that would be a tragedy.

Highlights of this last General Conference

1. President Hinckley "knighting" President Eyring with his cane after he was called to the First Presidency.

2. Elder Wirthlin showing what it really means to teach by example as he continued his talk on love for at least 10 minutes after he started shaking badly.

3. Getting to see conference in Salt Lake for the first time.

4. Taking Trax for the first time

5. Watching Jacob alternate between tired, confused look and cheesy smile.

6. Finding out who would be the next apostle and member of the First Presidency.

7. Being with the family all day long!

8. Mom's heavenly chocolate cake.

9. Driving up into the canyon afterward to see the leaves and the view of the valley.

Looking back at this conference weekend, we were blessed with a lot of great moments. It's nice to have a conference weekend like that to put things in perspective. Sister Mary N. Cook said that we should strengthen our relationships with our brothers and sisters because they may become our best friends. I'm grateful to know that my best friends are within my family. "For I have no greater joy than to know that my [family] walk in truth." --1 John 1:4

Pizza and PDA

The other day some friends invited me to come with them to Brick Oven and get pizza. A pretty harmless scenario . . . or so I thought! But, as the waitress sat us in our table, I noticed I was directly facing a couple in a booth. They were both sitting on the same side, which I thought was a little strange, but people do strange things some times. I joined in some conversation and forgot about the couple in the booth until I absentmindedly glanced over a few minutes later. They were kissing in the middle of Brick Oven! Honestly, who picks Brick Oven for their make-out site? I know this is BYU, but there are still some rules to protecting innocent eyes. And #1 should be "No Making Out in Restaurants!" Unfortunately this couple hadn't learned rule #1 yet. To my great amusement, after we started snickering, the guy turned around and scanned the room, like he was checking to see if anyone was watching. What does he think everyone else is going to think? It's not like slobbering on each other in public is exactly inconspicuous! But, apparently exchanging germs in plain view of the world is more important than enjoying a good meal. Maybe next time we can reserve the banquet room-- I'd like my pizza without PDA on the side, please!

A Missionary's Dream

As I was pondering what to write next, I had a flashback to my mission. The area was Sheboygan. My companion was Sister Thomas. The day was a preparation day, and I was bored, waiting for Sister Thomas to finish cleaning. In a moment of inspiration I picked up my pencil and this song was the result. It goes to the tune of 'Part of That World' from The Little Mermaid.

A Missionary's Dream

Look at this quad

Isn't it neat?

Wouldn't you say the marking's complete?

Wouldn't you say I'm prepared?

Prepared to start BAPTIZING!

Look at these talks . . .

Marked all in red

Got lots of scriptures all down in my head

Look through my backpack and see!

I've got everything!

I've got spare Book-of-Mormons a plenty

I've got pamphlets and pass-along cards galore

You want Proclamations on the Family?

I've got twenty!

But who cares?

No big deal!

I want more . . .

I want to be where the families are!

I want to see them reading their scriptures,

Praying sincerely and coming to church with their friends.

Knocking on doors doesn't get too far . . .

Members are required for lasting conversion

If only they knew what a difference their friendship could make!

When they reach out

And help their friends

And share the gospel with those close to them!

Watch and you'll see

Some day we'll be

The ones helping them!

What would I give if I could teach like Ammon or Aaron?

What would I pay to see new converts firm in the faith?

Wouldn't it be great if we could work

Hand in hand with our members.

No more tracting!

Sick of Sickles!

Where's the combine?

I'm ready to teach in the members' homes!

Ask them my questions and get some answers

Where did we come from before we came to this earth?

Then we could teach

And we could preach

And we could baptize all the day long!

Wouldn't it be great?

Oh, I can't wait!

It's a missionary's dream!

Meet Mini Kim

Welcome to my blog! I hope you enjoy my posts and at least get a few laughs out of them. I guess since this is titled Meet Mini Kim, I should tell a little about myself. I'm 23 and a student at BYU, majoring in Family History, working at Family History, serving in a Family History Calling. Did I mention I like Family History? Anyway, I like music, reading, writing, playing with my neices and nephews, baking, and being outdoors. I do not like PDA, girls that get married at 18 or 19, break-ups, or massive loads of homework.

Here's to a new blog and a new beginning!